Hurricane Screendoor
I can’t believe how lazy I am when it comes to updating this site.
Technically, I have a lot of free time every day, but since I’m hardly
ever around pc’s I just never think about it.
Tonight I’m suppose to
go out and “do things” with “people” so I’ll see how that pans out.
Apparently there are individuals out there who actually think I’m at
least partially competent to talk to and would for some reason enjoy
my company – however brief. Mostly, I just want to watch Band of
Brothers.
I should elaborate on my work routine:
7:30 AM – Arrive
7:30-8:30 – Await Daily Orders (Sit Around)
8:30-10:00 – Carry Out Orders (15 Minutes of work interspersed
between 1.5 hours of Talking about Music, Paintball, Brad’s Stories
and other Assorted Jibba Jabba)
10:00-11:30 – Prepare for Lunch
11:30-12:30 – Lunch
12:30-2:30 – Finish Work (More Talking, Argue with Adam about
alleged 1987 Springfield Hurricane*)
2:30-3:30 – Prepare for Departure
3:30 – Depart
As you can see, A day like this drains me of all the energy it
would require to write daily updates.
* Alright, I can’t think of anything but this dialogue which
occured between My coworkers, Adam (Strange Guy at Work), and Myself.
This all takes place during a session of box making (Yes, I make
boxes at my job – Stapling, Folding, Palletizing, whatever.) I should
mention that 2 mean operate staplers, and 1 (Adam) sits in a chair and
“prefolds”* the cardboard we use.
*Prefold = Waste of Time. Basically, Adam sits in a chair and
makes grunting noises while the other 2 guys do all the leg work.
Also Note: I in no way mean this dialogue to portray Adam in a
negative light. For all I know he could be retarded, and I would never
make fun of a retarded person. Ever.
(Brad and I assemble Boxes, Somewhat Physically Demanding Work)
Brad: “So Me and Betsy……..(Finishes a Story)”
Me: “Nice.”
Adam: (Mumbling) “My Hands Hurt.”
Brad: “What?”
Adam : “My hands hurt.”
Brad: “What do you mean your hands hurt? All you’re doing is
sitting in a chair and folding cardboard.”
Adam: “Man, you don’t think I’m doing any work, I’m a hardworker…(Mumbling).
Look, I even cut my hand (Points to small cut on right hand)”
Me: “You got City Hands, Boy”
Adam: “No way, look, I cut my hand!”
Me: “Dude, its a papercut….(under my breath) probably from
counting money.”
Adam: “What you talkin bout man? I’m hardcore. Look at this scar
(pulls up shirt sleeve to reveal a relatively large scar, then gets
unnecessarily close to me to display it)”
Brad: “What’s that from? Fall down?”
Adam: “A screen door.”
Brad: “A screen door? What were you trying to do?”
Adam: “The wind blew me through a screen door.”
Brad: “What wind?”
Adam: “A Hurricane.”
Brad: “When?”
Adam: “I’m not sure, It was when I was a little Kid. I don’t
remember.”
Me: “How can you not remember? Where were you living?”
Adam: “Springfield.”
Brad: “Springfield……..Virginia?”
Adam: “Yeah.”
Me: “There was never a Hurricane in Springfield Virginia. At least,
not in the last 20 years. And the bigger question is: Why were you
outside during a hurricane?”
—-
You have no idea how long that went on. I cannot describe the
hilarity.
——-
Random Notes:
– All Time Quarterback – Plans Get Complex
– FCPS is the freakiest school system ever. I’m not working here
again unless they want to pay me like a god.
– I sleep on the floor in my room – Just for the hell of it.
– I found a good restaurant – Coyote Grille
– My brother bought a pc. Quake 3 on a LAN, Baby.
– On a sad note: I still haven’t gotten my paycheck. Crappy
bi-weekly pay plus 2 week latency = Poor.