Cork on the Fork

As far as I know, tattoos are in style. As well as Latin.

The single most important discovery of the last two weeks is this: Cold
Weather necessitates TWO pairs of socks. Never before in my life have I been so
pleasantly surprised by such a simple notion.

You wouldn’t think 2mm of Wool could amount to a hill of beans against this
god damn-frickety-freezing weather, but you would be wrong. It’s not just beans,
its spaghettios. Or better yet, alphabet soup. I think I actually
maintained my core body temperature of 98.6 Degrees today. I feel like a new
man.

—————–

Im surprised how many people are unaware of the actual location of the
french riviera.

—————–

I’m thinking about getting a tattoo. Not one of those gay-ass butterflies, or
barbed wire armbands. Not even a gigantic american flag on my chest subtitled
“Bandwagon Patriot since 9-11.”

I’m thinking something more truthful, more meaningful, more exceptional. I’ve
already decided on Latin – but suggestions in that particular tongue are
appreciated.

———————

Deckard: She’s a replicant.
Eldon Tyrell: I’m impressed, Mr. Deckard. How many questions does it
normally take?
Deckard: I don’t get it…
Eldon Tyrell: How many?
Deckard: Twenty, thirty, cross-referenced.
Eldon Tyrell: But with Rachael it took more than a hundred.
Deckard: She doesn’t know.
Eldon Tyrell: She is beginning to suspect I think.
Deckard: Beginning to suspect? How can it not know what it is?

Eldon Tyrell: “More human than human” is our motto.

——————

I rarely continue beyond the movie quote, consider yourselves
blessed.

Read The Economist

Shun The Wall Street Journal

Read The Washington Post

Read the New York Times (With a Grain of Salt)

Shun Tucker (Fucker) Carlson

Listen to Elliot in the Morning

Live, Love and Eat.

-Wolfgang Puck (Only the Last Line)

You shouldn’t be able to achieve a centimeter deep papercut from a cardboard
box, It’s just compressed paper fiber, not a god damn x-acto knife. For only the
second time in my life I have actually bled onto a surface without
realizing it for at least 4 minutes and when I finally did? Hey, who needs
the actual tuition billing from JMU? I’ll just make a copy of the blood-stained
original and mail it in – those finance guys love documents coated in human
plasma.

—

I’m kidding, I’m kidding – Simply messing with you. Winter break was a
gigantic cheesecake coated with money – delicious, creamy, blueberry-flavored
money. It’s all going straight to South East Asia – no wait, they already have
6.7 Billion Dollars while the entire population of siberian Russia lives
in discarded segments of former oil pipeline.